So now that I actually have a little bit more time to actually update my blog, I can actually write a little bit. I look back at the past 9 months and how hard they were. The doctor, the delivery, the pains, the fact I ever got pregnant, and more that I carried her FULL term! I have just been given a miracle!! There have been so many hiccups, major and minor, that I honestly was losing faith all of this would work out to our benefit. I was more filled with fear and anxiety, just trying so hard to rely on the Lord and have the faith that I would need to see it all through. And now, I just sit back and look at this little miracle of an Angel that has been placed in my care, and am so overwhelmed! With joy and gladness, and thanks! It just brings me to tears every time I think about how it all ended up, and how the Lord's hand was over it all. We really had angels carrying us through to the very end. I've always been told that I was surrounded by angels, and that they were there in my times of need and of joy. I know they're still around us today. And I am so grateful for all of the support and prayers and just kind thoughts that got sent our way. They meant so much to me as I was going through all of this. And just seeing all of the people that rallied around us after wards, wanting to see Irie, and just wanting to know how they could help, letting us know we were loved! We really have been so blessed, and I want to thank all of you that allowed the Lord to work through your hands on our behalf. And now I have the sweetest little bundle of joy, in my arms!
I honestly never thought I would be able to know truly what it was like to bring something I had a hand in creating into this world. That total feeling of becoming a mother. I'm noticing the smallest changes in how protective and selfless I've become! And its just been such a natural transition for me, having her, that I hadn't even really noticed. Collin brought it up as he was thanking me for being an amazing Mom to Irie in the ways that I take care of her. Its the sweetest feeling I have ever felt. She has the sweetest, most pure, calming spirit about her. And she is strong, just filled with strength! All the nurses at the hospital, and the doctor kept telling me what a strong little girl I had!! She kinda had to be, and I knew that she would be- I could feel it the whole time I carried her. I know the Lord was with her, giving her added strength to handle the hiccups I was dealing with too! She gave me so much comfort, and now I find myself so often just sitting and staring at her, just in tears. Still taking strength from her. I'm just in awe, I can feel the spirit so strongly in those moments- its amazing! The Lord really does love his little ones. And how blessed I am to have been given one!! She has brought such immense joy into our lives, I never knew was missing. Even down to her soft little cry! It breaks my heart to hear it, but its just so simple and cute! She is the tiniest little baby we've ever had in my family- I want her to just stay that way! I know the time will come and slowly she'll get bigger and bigger...but for now, I am just enjoying it all while I still can! Isn't it amazing how in these tiny little bodies are these giant spirits, so matured, and perfect? These spirits that are in our hands to mold and shape and prepare them for whats coming?! I've always been told that motherhood would be my greatest calling in life- and now I'm so excited to do just that! And watch her grow and become who the Lord wants her to be through my hands. I know this was more of a personal entry, but I just had to get it out and into writing. I am just constantly reminded of the little MIRACLE she is! The miracle this whole journey has been! And just the miracle of life itself!
